I have had a lot of thoughts that have been floating around in my head for the past 7 months as you can imagine. A LOT! I can't believe I am officially to month 8! Out of everything though, I have come to realize in this duration of time that I am incredibly, and I mean incredibly, blessed!
In speaking with my mama on a day-to-day basis, she is ever so quick to remind Jason and I to count our blessings and understand that this pregnancy has been amazing! I don't mean that in a bragging way, of course, and I sure don't want to make it seem like I haven't had hard times, but they are minuscule in comparison to others and I just feel so lucky. I really would just like to pay tribute to all those amazing mothers out there who either have had a hard time getting pregnant in the first place, have experienced morning sickness and all its nauseous glory, have had premature difficulties, have been on bed rest, have suffered from some pregnancy induced medical condition, or really who have just had a rough go.
My eyes are always reopened as I hear stories of 1-pound or premature babies, losing a child, losing a husband, the post-baby body complex, no sleep, labor difficulties, the emotional trauma, and really just the struggle that comes with being a mother in general. I will be honest it is terrifying and with how well this pregnancy has gone I am sure this baby will be a little monster. I am expecting the worst.
That's okay though.
It's okay because all of my life I have wanted this. I have wanted to be a mother, to create a baby, and call it my own. I know it won't be easy and I know my trials will come but for some reason that makes me more excited! I am in no way prepared for what lies ahead and I am constantly reminded that I am a bit naive going into motherhood but who isn't their first time? You can scare me, try to prepare me, give advice, tell me your horror stories and I will love every moment. I have really enjoyed hearing different perspectives. Some are absolutely petrifying, but how amazing that you get to be a mother!
Just on a final note, I of course love and appreciate my friends, aunts, sisters, etc., but I owe my own parents the world. We all go through that moment in our lives where we turn to them and apologize for being the adolescent brats we once were but my appreciation goes a lot farther back than that. My twin brother and I were born 3 months premature and I have posted about it here before but have never been able to try and relate to it until now. I am at 32 weeks but in my mom's situation would have had twins at 28 weeks. That's 2 little babies being airlifted to Edmonton, weighing 3 pounds each, having all sorts of complications, creating numerous physical complications of her own, with a hard-working husband, and 4 other little kids at home. Are you kidding me?! Like I said, I owe them the world.
We were miracles but they are my miracle.
We are beyond excited to meet our little lady in just 8 (way too far away) weeks!