December 9, 2015

Mamahood Funks • my love/hate with social media


Disclaimer: I have been thinking this post out for way too long so there might be a lot of scattered thoughts and emotion haha. Bear with me. 

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My take on life the past couple of months has been tricky. Moving to a new city will always be an adjustment but I am definitely not giving up on Lethbridge yet haha. There are just different dynamics all around and for some odd reason I feel especially detached with all the hustle and bustle around me. Mamahood will do that. Remi is a gem of a sleeper and so there is a chunk of my day where I get to chill at home. Time alone. Time spent thinking, thinking and thinking. 

How I spend my time varies. Some days it's a call to a sibling, an efficient day of house work, a snooze, a day catching up on shows, an experiment with a meal, a failed attempt at exercising, catching up on organizing/documenting photos, a shower and a cute outfit with maybe some makeup slapped on, a new project etc., etc., etc. I love my hours of quiet freedom but some days I feel super cooped up and no matter how often I set play dates, make trips to the mall, or kick it with my pals, I just have to face the fact: mamahood gets lonely. I remember feeling this way when Remi was just new but I figured with time it would fade and I would kick these isolation woes to the curb! Not necessarily so. Things have become more lively and a bit more exciting with Remi as a toddler now and I love being a mom but I think it's okay to admit that it's still hard.

"I've been a bit blah... kind of lazy... and not very productive.
I spend too much time looking at screens instead of at my kids.
I refresh my email more than my soul.
I eat junk instead of the fruits and veggies in my fridge.
I get bored, lazy and overall unproductive."

Sound familiar? This, my friend, is called The Mom Funk. I think we can all relate with a line or two, amiright?!

I'm zeroing in on the the screen comment because one thing that has really increased our struggle as mothers today is social media. That dang picture-perfect social media. How many of you have caught yourself scrolling and starting to compare? Um... GUILTY! Too many of my family and friends have deleted accounts, taken a break, or completely removed themselves from social media for this reason. Not only is it easy to wish for something you might not have, but you also don't actually get to know someone through their instagram accounts. No matter how genuine they seem, they are being viewed on a screen and not in person. One-on-one conversation is something I find key and you just aren't going to build meaningful relationships through just social media. (someone please make this topic a class in our school systems for the poor teens who obsess over numbers, likes, and #relationshipgoals! Your worth is not determined by the amount of likes you receive!) 

Social media is distracting for everyone.

I went through a complete shopaholic phase where I would see beautiful people, see what outfits or baby products they were promoting, and completely impulse buy. I'm 100% embarrassed to admit this but it happened and it was ridiculous. I wasn't crazy out of control but it's scary how quick I wanted to be like someone else, even if it was Hailey Devine. (!!!) The pressures of social media as a mother are a struggle. We want to be able to seem like we have it together, we want to snap back into shape (or into reality in general) like before, we want genuine and real outlooks that provide us reassurance, we want to be pretty, we want to be talented, we want great relationships with our husbands, families and friends, we want to provide the best for our littles, we want to be creative and fun, we just want to be happy.

The only reason I haven't thrown in the towel and become an isolated hermit on a mountain top is because we all know how much love there is in social media. If you don't base your worth on it, a like on a photo can feel good. I love photos and I like to create edits or posts that will mean something someday. I love the memories captured in a picture, motivation triggered from a pin, and knowledge gained from an informative post. There are a lot of great movements out there that remind us to stay inspired! For example:

Be Nice To Your Selfie
Be Bona•Fide
Project You+Me
happy bloggers in general >>
 The Parrish Place 
The Langs 
Bethany Menzel
The Wiegands
The Daybook
and fantastic friend mom bloggers you can relate to >>
Kylie
Cassie
Bethy
Lauren
Jennica
Chanel
Lo

I have found a lot of hope and encouragement in my lonely rutts through the insights of these fabulous ladies and it gets me up and motivated! It's then that I realize the comparisons are unnecessary because as mamas I feel like there is a universal unwritten rule that we have for one another and that is that we have each other's backs. We are all just being ourselves and trying to cope. You might be bummed that you don't have a rocking bod, but what if you ARE that person with the bod? That's impressive. You might not be super creative but girl, you are a good friend and that means the world to someone. You might have a hellion of a child but you're patient and after you punch that wall you get up and keep trying haha.
The fact is, no matter how together people seem to have it, they have their trials too, they have their funks. Mamahood funks happen. The struggle is real, girlfren. Keep smiling.

5 comments:

  1. holy moly loved this post! So so much truth, you described my feeling perfectly! Thanks for the shout out :) you're awesome

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  2. I do love a good dose of blog reality every once in a while!! Mama funk is such a perfect way of putting it! A lifetime of motherhood to go for all of us. It's a journey in itself, discovering all over again who you are. Grateful for some great mamas who keep me going!!!

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    Replies
    1. So so true! Glad we are on the same page here. :)

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  3. nailed it on the head! oh the mom funk. Winter it is the worst for it I find!

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